Master T Why Have Your Forsaken Us?

pop (all love) took one for the team last week and live-blogged the Much Music Video Awards, which is getting just as plastic as the Junos. Awards went to Canadians who don't get played enough (Metric, Kardinall, Buck 65) and more went to the ones that get played far too much like Nickelback and Simple Plan. I sound like an old fart, but this show doesn't bode well for the musical tastes of the Much audience. Hedley just gives me a case of faux-punk fatigue. Add in enough fodder to feed celebrity tabloids for a few days and you have the best of Much Music on display. Man, George Stroumbolopoulos got out of there when the getting was good.

As much as I crush on Sarah Taylor and Hannah Sung, not even these two could compel me to watch this crapfest.

Also see: paved.ca: Mary Jo Eustace attempts to kill the video star

Highlights of pop (all love) live blogs MMVA:

7:41pm. A bunch of scantily clad women just jumped out of a police van and are frisking the hand-cuffed members of Hedley. In the background, a MuchMusic staffer can be seen commanding the assembled teenagers to scream their delight. You see, it's not that the kids genuinely like Hedley. It's that they feel obligated to pretend.

8:58pm. Paris Hilton arrives and the camera pans across her adoring public. One sign appears to read "Paris Hilton is an ugly woman." Do you figure Much let that cameraman finish his shift or did they fire him on the spot?

9:06pm. Game Five of the NBA Finals is starting and Clarence Clemons is doing the American national anthem on saxophone. It's never sounded better. Just thought you should know.

9:14pm. Hedley performs while a group of 12-year-olds engage in the saddest mosh pit in rock history."

9:39pm. I defy you to name a worse rock band in the genre's history than Simple Plan. Go ahead. Try. It's not possible. I refuse to believe anyone else even comes close.

10:40pm. Fall Out Boy are apparently considered sex symbols. Is this a sign that society has regressed or evolved? Discuss.

10:46pm. Jacob Hoggard presents an award with his pants pulled down to expose his buttocks. He's like Johnny Rotten for a generation of total wusses.