Les Coquettes warm you up with a Love Story this weekend

It's chilly out there this Valentine's weekend. What better way to warm up with your sweetie this Saturday night then taking in the newest show from Toronto's premiere cabaret burlesque troupe, Les Coquettes, in a show they call Love Story.

With the ladies and gentlemen of Les Coquettes, your guaranteed to be tantalized. I was first swayed by their charms at the Spiegel show at Harbourfront in summer 2007, where I described the troupe as "playful, bawdy, lusty, and glamorous performance; choreographed titillation in beautiful costumes, with the women (and guy) enticing the audience with the old “you give them a little bit, you take it back; you show them a little more, you take it back”. They put the tease in striptease".

Can you think of any group better suited to tell you a Love Story?

On Valentines’ weekend, Toronto’s premiere cabaret burlesque troupe weaves together some of history’s greatest tales of love. Experience the triumph and heartache in an evening of song, dance, striptease and cirque.

One night only! Two spectacular shows! Bring your sweetie! Meet your soul mate! Sit between your wife and... girlfriend and hope they hit it off!

credit Ryan Visima for the above 2 photos

Saturday February 13th
The LOT
100A Ossington Avenue
Early Show - 7:00 pm
Lounge open at 6:00
Late Show – 9:30 pm
Tickets - $25-50*
To order tickets please visit http://www.lescoquettes.com

* $50 VIP tickets for this fundraiser include priority seating at a cabaret table and a complimentary specialty cocktail. Tax receipts for $25 available upon request.

A few tickets remain so hit http://lescoquetteslovestory.eventbrite.com/ quick!

The Male of the Species

Based on a conversation with a friend, I put this forth to my readers. The term cougar is used frequently (but not really justly, some taking offence) to describe an older woman who preys on younger guys, either in a dating or casual way. Some signs of cougar-ness include mom's wearing their daughter's clothes, and 40 -year olds wearing clubwear to work.

But to the question: in the interest of gender equality, what name do you have for the male equivalent of a cougar? The old mid-life crisis kicks in and you go trolling for 20 year olds.

We're going with the age old formula to determine age appropriateness: (Your Age/2 +7).

This ties in to the game I play at bars and restaurants called "Date or Daughter", as in "is that his date or his daughter?" If you're participating in this game, you might be a male cougar.

A friend suggested "Jackal", but I'd pick "Puma" or "Panther" just to keep it in the cat family.

Creepy old dude is applicable.

Answering "what do you call a guy who tries to pick up significantly younger women?" with "Jason" is not accepted.

• a "Liger"... a liger crosses the species boundry as much as a sleezy old man crosses the age boundry.
• Provided by an anonymous source: '"my boss"but that's not really the answer your looking for'
• I'd go with Coyote - cause most of the time they are out for themselves with little care to the rest of the world, oh and they're dumb to - picture "wile E Coyote"

Thoughts?

Sexile Island

In a conversation with a friend, I learned a new phrase:

Her: “…. So the three guys are rooming together at the hotel, but I’m worried that two of them may end up being sexiled.”

Me: “What the hell is sexiled?”

“Sexile” is something we’ve all done, but I never knew it had a proper name. It’s when you boot your roommate from the room/dorm/apartment so you can have sex. It’s a mutually beneficial move: the “sexiled” party doesn’t have to worry about overhearing anything (“Wow, she sure cries a lot during sex. Oh wait, it’s him”) and avoids the awkward post-coital encounter (“Hey, you’re the new girl"). One can be sexiled, as when you come home to find the door locked, or self-sexiling, when you walk in, realize someone is having sex in your room and you get the hell out of there before you see something you can't wipe out of your memory even with grain alcohol.

My first self-sexiled encounter came when I first moved into East Rez at University of Guelph. I walked into my room and my roommate and his girl were in bed. I immediately apologized, but then he says “Oh no dude, it’s all right, come on in.”

Um, no.

I crashed on the couch in the lounge after that. The lounge was shared between 10 other co-ed roommates, and most of my friendships with the other dorm-mates came from conversations that went: “You’re roommate’s a freak, let’s go to the Trash* and drink.”

* The Trasheteria in Guelph, where I learned to drink watered down Rye & Cokes for $2.50 while dancing to 90s alternative music. Good times.

There’s an episode of Judd Apatow’s TV series “Undeclared” that perfectly illustrates the “sexile” phenomenon. “Sick In The Head”, written by Seth Rogan (Knocked Up), finds the main character sexiled from his dorm room, and finding all the other sexiled roommates forming a support group in the rec room.

Self-sexiling is a "taking one for the team" move, and should be recognized as such. You may have to smooth over relations with the roommate (as the sexiled party) who was expecting to come home and chill, and now finds themselves kicked out of their own room. Maybe keep a stash of movie passes or coffee cards handy in the common area.

Being sexiled is more likely to happen when you’re sharing a room in a dorm or a hotel. The most common indication that you may be sexiled is a locked door and a tie/nylons/Native American headdress on the doorknob. Then you have no choice but to kill time at a coffee shop or the movies, or devising ways to pay back your roommate by, let’s say, sending religious brotherhoods to the door or hanging a “Mission-ary Accomplished” banner in the hallway. In the case of a hotel sexiling, you can order inappropriate room service to be sent up ("Sir, we've brought your dozen cucumbers, 2 jars of strawberry jam, a bag of adult diapers, and litre of baby oil"). That will likely serve as a lesson to sort out the sexile protocol before you head out on the town.