Knives Out: Kitchen Not So Confidential

"NOBODY ASKED ME, BUT……By Anthony Bourdain":

In which Anthony Bourdain, chef, author of Kitchen Confidential, and sufferer of no fools, gives his opinion on Food Network and it's emphasis on personalities and spectacle rather than cooking. At least Alton Brown (every show he hosts is an education) and Giada De Laurentiis (chef most likely to be featured in Maxim, but Lord can she cook) come out of it relatively unscathed.

The ubiquitous Rachel Ray does not fare so well:

Complain all you want. It’s like railing against the pounding surf. She only grows stronger and more powerful. Her ear-shattering tones louder and louder. We KNOW she can’t cook. She shrewdly tells us so. So...what is she selling us? Really? She’s selling us satisfaction, the smug reassurance that mediocrity is quite enough. She’s a friendly, familiar face who appears regularly on our screens to tell us that “Even your dumb, lazy ass can cook this!” Wallowing in your own crapulence on your Cheeto-littered couch you watch her and think, “Hell…I could do that. I ain’t gonna…but I could--if I wanted! Now where’s my damn jug a Diet Pepsi?” more

Bourdain's ruthless honesty and insights have served him well as a guest judge on Top Chef this year, where he described one dish having been made with Flintstonian Execution. And that was a compliment. Sort of.

Anthony Bourdain:(on Michael's dishes) That was so perverse, so inappropriate, I'm almost beginning to respect him.

What can I say, I admire any guy who is a world class chef, has been to the bottom to the top in his profession, and loves punk music. His favourite album is Fun House by Iggy Pop and The Stooges (5-star dessert island classic, the2scoops approved) and playing of music by Billy Joel in his kitchen is grounds for immediate firing.