Hayes Quits South Park, Takes His Salty Chocolate Balls and Goes Home

South Park has satirized many religious icons and institutions, but when they eventually turned their eye to Scientology, it was enough to cause one of their voice actors to quit. Isaac Hayes, the voice of Chef and real life Scientologist, quit the show this week.

Hayes has stated his decision is based on his opinion that South Parks creators are showing a "growing insensitivity" to religions, but most people assume it is due to the season nine classic episode "Trapped in the Closet" that saw fourth grader Stan become the saviour of Scientology and skewered Scientology and its celebrity spokesmen Tom Cruise and John Travolta. In a statement, the soulful singer, most famously known for his song "Shaft", had this to say:

There is a place in this world for satire, but there is a time when satire ends and intolerance and bigotry towards religious beliefs of others begins. Religious beliefs are sacred to people, and at all times should be respected and honored. As a civil rights activist of the past 40 years, I cannot support a show that disrespects those beliefs and practices.

http://yeeeah.com/blog/2006/03/14/isaac-hayes-quits-south-park/

Chef was arguably one of the most popular adult characters on South Park, though he has not been as prominent in recent seasons. The resident ladies man and cafeteria chef was the voice of wisdom to the boys, answering their questions about women and race relations with smooth and sexy songs.

Hayes had no problems when the show took some vicious shots at the Catholic church, revivalists or Judaism, but when it came to Scientology, he took his salty chocolate balls and went home. South Park co-creator Matt Stone issued this statement:

This has nothing to do with intolerance and bigotry and everything to do with the fact that Isaac Hayes is a Scientologist and that we recently featured Scientology in an episode of 'South Park.' In 10 years and over 150 episodes of 'South Park,' Isaac never had a problem with the show making fun of Christians, Muslims, Mormons and Jews. He got a sudden case of religious sensitivity when it was his religion featured on the show. To bring the civil rights struggle into this is just a non-sequitur. Of course we will release him from his contract and we wish him well.

Channel Island: The TV Industry Blog: "Chef Tells 'South Park' to Fudge Off"

No word on whether the Chef character will be killed off or just not be seen anymore, but I think we can safely say that the South Park guys will deal with this in the appropriate manner - I suppose it could become a running gag in the new season...

Let us remember some favourite Chef songs as we say good-bye to Mr. Hayes:

* The Prostitute Song (To James Taylor's "Your Smiling Face")
o "A prostitute is someone who will love you/No matter who you are or what you look like/But that's not why you pay prostitute. No, you don't pay her to stay/You pay her to leave afterwards/That's why I praise the Lord for prostitutes!Ladies n gentelmen, Mr. James Taylor!" JamesT:"A prostitute is like any other woman/They all trade something for sex, and they do it well..."

* Chef's Christmas Song
o "I'm gonna lay ya down by the yule log/I'm gonna love you right/Baby, I'm gonna deck your halls/And silence your night/Girl, you'll hear the herald angels sing/When I'm sliding off your bra/Girl, I just can't wait to jingle your bells/And fa-la-la your la!"

* Chef on Where Babies Come From
o "When a man loves a woman/And a woman loves a man/...Well, sometimes the man doesn't love the woman,/But he pretends like he does, in order to get some action."

* Simultaneous
o "Baby, you know you're the girl for meeeeee/And all that I want to beeeee..../You!/And Me!/...And her! SI-MUL-TAN-E-OUS!You!/And Me!/And you and you!/Simultaneous lov-in, baby/two or three!/SI-MUL-TAN-E-OUS!/Oooh, that's right..."

* Chef as a zombie (Sung to Michael Jackson's "Thriller".)
o "I'm gonna make love, even when I'm dead. My body might be cold, but it's always hot in my bed. Make love, you don't have to be afraid. Just because my heart ain't beaten. Doesn't mean you can't get laid. Owwwww.

* Sometimes you kill your teacher
o "Sometimes you kill your teacher and they find your semen in her stomach, and uh"

* Shovel that Snow
o "Shovel that snow, babih, it's all nice, heavy and wet"

* Just Play it Cool
o "Sometimes you fall in love and you think it feels that way forever./You change your life and didn't know your friends cause you think it can't get any better./But then love goes away; no matter what, it doesn't stay as strong./And then you're left with nothing, cause you're tinking with your dong."

* Tonight is Right for Love (from the Pot-bellied Elephant episode)
o "Tonight is right for love, you know I want to touch you where the lights don't go."

Chef (South Park character) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Channel Island: The TV Industry Blog: "Chef Tells 'South Park' to Fudge Off"
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